2018-03-20 - The Balances

Drugs. Drugs make all the pain go away, and Jean's on quite a few of them. Either that or she's on some pain blocking that Xavier did...it's hard to tell right now, but she's clearly drifting into a deep, long sleep. The people around her are happy. She needs it, after what she's been through, and settled in her bed, she's finally looking a little bit relaxed.

Her spirit, however, is going places. Literally, she's crossing the cosmos tonight. Spending some time out of body is good for her, and she feels more free than she has trapped in her corporeal form lately anyway. And space is...beautiful.

Jean is dreaming. Her body is in bed on painkillers. She has not yet heard what has happened while she slept. Sealed in her own mental cocoon. She is amongst the stars. Flying. Traveling. Just a thin tether holding her soul to her body. She is amongst the cosmos. Far, far from Earth.

is she seeking something? A fragment of herself or what she once was? Is she just dreaming? Is she journeying? Does it really matter amongst the realms far, far from the third planet orbiting a star in the corner fo the Milky Way?

The sun that Jean passes gives her nourishment. It gives all life nourishment, but for her it's a little more deep, a bit more filling. The warmth of the sun...it gets into your bones, and she's missed having that strength. She shines, and takes time to glow for a little while. A tiny star herself. Time is endless out here, and there's no pain.

Which might be a bit startling when she actually HEARS someone talking, behind her.

I THOUGHT MY JOURNEY HAD ENDED. YOU ARE NO PLANET, FILLED WITH LIFE.

Galactus, in all his immensity, is not so far away. He isn't even truly visible...but he never needed to be. Humans perception is so limited.

This is terror. This is raw induction. While Galactus might see the Phoenix on equal, if dangerous terms.. Jean was but a wisp of flame, a match that could be snuffed out amongst the cosmos with but a flick of fingers. Why had she come here? Why had she floated through all the cosmos however many thousand light years to here?

In reality, the light tether stretching out infinitely to her body spasmed as she circled the star. She went to breathe. What did she remember.. >>You are part of the cycle. Life, death, rebirth. Your time has yet to end. But all things eventually will. Including time.<<

Without haste, the great old being appears. It seems to not rush, and yet is somehow simply there. Jean knew that trick herself once. Perhaps she shall again. Galactus simply looks at Jean, as curious as a mountain. Or as a child.

I HAVE NOT MET ALL BEINGS IN TWENTY BILLION YEARS. YOU ARE OLDER THAN YOUR FORM SUGGESTS, AND YOU FEEL OF WORLDS. JUST AS I DO.

He makes it a question, somehow. He is confused by who he's found, but as always there is that ever-present sense of threat. How he could snuff you out instantly...or simply move on. This is a being that lives on other lives...and has seen so much, for so very long.

Jean floats. Or her consciousness does. Well aware that with but a thought the elder being from the galaxy before could simply blink and make her to nothingness. Or send her home however many thousands of light years but wiht a thought. Jean does not show her fear, but she rdiates it. She shivers.

But, she focuses up to Galactus. >>Do you really wish to be as you are? Do you wish others to be as you are? You have a purpose, but you are merely oging through teh steps of it. Integral as you are, if you did not take and give, would it change things in the greater scheme of the cosmos?<<  Jean Grey thinks your'e fine!

Galactus seems to think. For an eternity, he thinks. Time has no meaning, so he chooses to consider his actions before responding. If he is one thing, the mighty Galactus is in no hurry. But he does speak, when he is ready.

THE GAME MUST CONTINUE. UNTIL THE END OF TIME, WHEN I MEET MY OWN FATE. IT IS NOT FOR ME TO KNOW ALL THINGS BEFORE THEY COME, STAR-CHILD.

He sees her now, and he understands her. Those eyes, the size of ten, look at the astral woman. Without emotion. Timeless.

WHY ARE YOU BROKEN? YOU ARE SMALL THIS TIME.

Has he met her before? Or does he mean...Phoenix?

Jean would not be surprised if Galactus has met Phoenix. She would not know if they were rivals, cosmic beings passing, adversaries.. Or merely two facets of existence. Required for the continuum to exist, being there from beginning to end.

>>I.. Was but a facet of her. Given attention. A part of her that she saw fit to use to expeience and broaden herself. She is gone now from me. Just have her memories.<<

For Jean a dangerous thing to admit, but she feels a rare sort of thing with the Devourer of Worlds. Understanding.

The answer from Galactus is telling. A quiet, as he thinks on this answer. Then, finally, he says,

AH.

He turns his eyes to the star. It is...difficult to read his meaning, on his face or his actions. But eventually he speaks once more.

YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOURSELF. DO YOU WISH IT?

Galactus does not ask. That much is normal, it is assumed. If he wants, he simply acts. So asking...there must be good reason why he'd choose to give a choice.

His thoughts are beyond what mere mortlas would comprehend. Even for those who are a part of the cosmoc, Galactus is but a being older than they. His motives, his morales, his pursuits are beyond what they can fathom. He merely is.

For Jean, there is an element of danger. An element of temptation. An element of want. An element of desperation. And for this precoius moment.. She fails.

>>Yes. Yes I do. I want to understand. Please.<<

IT IS DONE.

The ancient eyes flash, and the Power Cosmic engulfs Jean. Not to give her power, though that is inevitable and she will come away stronger. Not to take it, though that too...will come in time. This time, for her to see.

Life, yet not life. The potential of life. Life to come. The unborn, between states of being. This is a cosmic entity, the essence. To be between states of being, and yet above them. The Phoenix existed in all spaces and times at once, beyond time. In order to be part of Jean, it had to limit itself to one place. So small, yet powerful because of that focus. It made it stronger. It learned.

Being Jean helped it grow. By teaching it how to be less, it became more.

Phoenix changed, then. It learned how to adapt, how to become. It travelled, it experienced things it already knew for the first time. Amazing!

Jean was not it's first host, it teaches you. There were others, many others. Too many to count. Every time it learns something new, and as it learns, it teaches it to...itself. Too confusing, there is no sense to the messages.

Yet it is true, and Jean learns one thing. The Phoenix is a child.

And that hits her. In whatever form comprehension dawns, she understands it. The Phoenix, the Celestial Avatar, is but.. When it comes to the realm of experience.. Now Jean feels ashamed. Ashamed for hating it. Ashamed for the loathing she had put upon it for what it had done. I thad saved it. It had just wanted to experience things it had never had.

And she saw what it had done, what it had given her, what it had just wanted to expeirence as reasont o hate it. And she just stammers and murmurs..

>>I.. I'm sorry. I..<<

Didn't realize? Didn't know? Denied it? She just feels so small again. So much just a figment, a speck of dust, another little molecule thrown out amongst the stars.

YOU ARE NOT COMPLETE. THERE IS ONE MORE...BUT YOU MUST BE READY TO LEARN IT.

This is Galactus, still here. Still waiting for something to click. Or for something....totally beyond Jean's thoughts. But there is a feeling of moment, of how important Jean being here truly is.

REACH OUT. YOU ALREADY KNOW...LEARN IT FOR THE FIRST TIME, AGAIN.

Galactus does no more, but there is a sense of another watching. Waiting. A man, with no hair. Quiet. The Watcher is here as well. Something important is to come.

Galactus is.. Beyond the scope of comprehension. Or even visualization. Even in her astral form, Jean is jsut seeing a warped, mallable thing made from her own perceptions. Without the Power Cosmic, he is something beyond waht can be comprehended.

>>What.. What do I have to learn?<< She does not want the Phoenix back. Sh is well aware of the terror of that extra-spacial consciousness. But she can fear it. She can miss it. She can understand why it was not meant to be.

<>

There is no response from Galactus now. He simply waits. He will wait til the end of time, if he needs to. Though worlds may die for his hunger, and they will, there is a balance to all things. The essense of death, the mighty end. If he is the end, brought to a real form...

There must be one who symbolizes the beginning. Not the beginning...Galactus is not just the ultimate end, but an end through all time.

What is he waiting for her to realize?

Jean waits, and she focuses, turning her thoughts inward. >>Are you Death? And is she LIfe? Are you two Rebirth?<< She's not sure if this is what she is meant to realize. OR that both are merely things. Which exist. Beyond the comprehension of what is and what will be.

She takes a breath. Thinking of the coldness of the beginning of time to the end.

Jean Grey takes a breath, closing her eyes. <<I am one of many. Many will come after. She is.. Part of us all. Everything that has been, is, and will be<<

More than that, child.

Now it's more, it's someone talking who's not Galactus. Not the Watcher. Someone else, familiar but...no. Just familiar.

More than that, always. The Phoenix, the one who you were, is all beings. All creation, she is my child brought to life. I watch you all, and the ones who she decides to come out of are always chaotic. But life is chaos. Free will will always bring you to trouble. It will also bring you home.

ALL LIFE IS ONE. Galactus speaks. He can clearly hear it too, as he speaks to...something beyond even him.

And for some reason, Jean is here to listen as well. As the witness for life, as is there one for death.

She is them all. She is the spark that fed them. SHe will be the spark that burns them to nothing in the end. And Jean feels very, very small. An very, very connected. Part of something greater. Something that will always be there. Even when the rest of them have passed along. Leaving their mark upon it.

She bows to Galactus <<Thank you for showing me. Thank you for teaching me. Thank you for taking away my blindness. I.. Understand now. A little more. I have so much to learn, so much to see that I never will. Thank you for enlightening me<<

Galactus does not turn. He doesn't need to. But he does vanish. Somehow, just gone. Perhaps he was never there.

But his voice lingers, as it likely always will, leaving Jean...a little stronger.

NOTHING IS EVER LOST, SO LONG AS IT WAS KNOWN. YOU WILL KNOW FOR ALL TIME.

There is a pause, but the small addendum comes down as something...perhaps just as important.

AND SO...SOMEDAY I WILL AS WELL.

Beyond time, indeed.

Jean takes a breath. She focuses. She reaches out as if in.. Comfort? An empty gesture, but one that is of sympathy.

<<I hope in time, however long that time is, you find your peace. That you find your rest. And that in the end of everything you find your purpose fulfilled. Because you are part of the chain as well.<<

Jean offers with trepidation. Just a little bit more. Even as she relaxes. And gives a final gesture of respect.