2012-09-02 - Invader Skrull: Pigeon Shit

Storming his way in through the front door of the Baxter Building, Ben is currently covered in what seems to be a mix of banana peels and pigeon droppings as he shakes his fist out, "I'll get you kids if it's the last thing I do!" The laughter of the #$#! Yancy Street Boys as they bolt away out front.

And there is someone there right now inside the Baxter Building, actually waiting for Benjamin Grimm. Natu is sitting in a lobby chair, a yellow rope wrapped about her waist - a strange color for a Lantern to be wearing to say the least - and reading a magazine. Or rather trying to, she is mostly having her ring translate it as she looks at the pictures, like audio books!

At least until Ben comes storming in, yelling away, and she blinks those purple eyes at Ben. She chokes on a bit of laughter, coughs, and then carefully and with GREAT concentration, works on closing her magazine and setting it aside.

The receptionist Roberta clears her throat before saying, "You have a visitor Ben." She then motions toward Natu. "Green Lantern Natu."

Ben Grimm glances over at Roberta and gives a nod, "Thanks. What can I do ya for Natu?" Ben puts his hands over on his hips in a gesture akin to putting his hands in his pockets, not that he has any at the moment. Roberta is actually a gynoid that Reed has done numerous experiments on making her personality warmer and more human, an ongoing project of his dating back to the beginning of the FF.

Natu clears her throat, "Ah well...," a pause, and then she tries again, "You see...," and pauses again. She stares, and her lips twitch. She's really trying to stay serious, and considering how serious of a person she is when Ben last met her, must mean just how comical he looks right now. "I think you need a shower." Then her purple eyes widen slightly, "Not to be offensive! But are pigeons of earth no disease car...," she pauses again, then sighs and covers her face with one hand. She chokes on a snicker. "Mr. Grimm, I do believe you can afford to be a little more...presentable. I am here on official business." She is really trying to be considerate of Ben's feelings!

Ben Grimm glances over at Natu, and shrugs his stony shoulders, "Eh, kids will be kids. I'll hose myself off later. What can I do fer ya Miss?" Ben went to wipe some of teh goop off, only it getting stuck to his hands as he sighed, "What a revoltin' development.."

Natu gives up and floats upward to her feet. She then walks over to Ben and with her light power, she actually starts to...hose him off! Well, gently. She just envisioned the green light to be water, and she is easily showering off Ben. They will just have to mop the floor later. Or not.

Once poor Ben is cleaned up and dried off as they say, an energy blast is let loose from the ring and actually destories the organic waste, but doesn't damage the tile flooring. "Well, that's better. No more bad smell." Yes, a Green Lantern just did maid service for Ben Grim.

Ben Grimm takes the hosing off by thre emerald energy with all the dignity he can muster as pigeon poop was blasted off, "Ah, I'd better warn ya that if you do that again Stretch will probably come here down with a gizmo and want to ask you do that a few more times so he can take scans."

Natu wrinkles her nose, "I shall of course gracefully decline. I rather not see you covered in such filth again Mr. Grimm. Your dignity is more important to me than this Mr. Stretch's curousity." Awwww, isn't that just sweet?! "As I stated earlier," back to business! "I wished to speak to you privately about something." This subterfuge thing is not Natu's style, so who knows what she sounds like she is asking for! Sounding so professional, but her wording so vague.

Ben Grimm glances over at Natu and sighs, "Sure, what can I help you for?" He goes to step over to the side then, motioning to the floating Lantern, "And nah, I'm pretty sure that he wouldn't notice if ya left that part out." Ben is used to Reed's proclivities.

"That is odd, is it not?" But once again back to topic, and she sighs softly. "Private. Do you wish to come with me perchance, if that would be better?" Natu isn't against that idea, and is sure she can find someplace private. The moon works too!

Ben lets out a laugh, "Oh, I'm sure that's just how Stretch is." Ben walks along, heading to one of the conference rooms on teh ground floor.

Natu then follows. She mentally commands the ring to scan for security in the conference room when the two of you reach it. And if you do not close the door behind the two of you, she will, curtains closed. Well...that is a little suspicious, isn't it? But she's an alien, maybe this is normal for her?

The ring would notice a rather large amount of security wtihin the conference room, and a bedazzling array of scanners of numerous types throughout the area. Reed's been extremely thorough in his security setup, but the ring's scan is pinged as a non-invasive passive, and so the scanners watch it, but do not signal an alert as Ben waits over for her to continue.

"Paranoid much?" A comment on what Ben would likely have no clue. So she does this another way. Suddenly, there is a large bubble of green energy about her and Ben Grimm, and it is a dark green so that the cameras cannot see through for lip reading....not that it work on her side anyway. She is speaking her native tongue and the ring actually translates it somehow. Natu then asks perhaps the most awkward thing in her entire life, "Would you overly mind if I tied you up?"

Ben cocks his head, catching that you're saying something under your breath.. And then yelps over, "Ahh, ma'am, no matter what you see in the funny pictures I can tell ya I'm not into that. IF you're looking, I'm told there's this lady in white out at the Xavier Institute.." Ben's ready for a fight, but not instigating one.

Natu stares intently. And it takes a moment, her eyes widen, "I do not know of this lady and what she has to do with Xavier's Institute, but I most certainly do not mean that." Her cheeks get extra red, which is shockingly possible. "Your wrists would be fine. It's a trust test." She can't even come up with an elborate story about it being a homeworld tradition, because she really just doesn't think that way. She then motions with her wrists, placing them together, palms up. "Like this. It will help us bond, so that we can safely discuss things without fear of betrayal." She really doesn't mean it the way Ben may take it! But hey, leave it to a communication hiccup.

Ben calmly stands up, "Uhm, Miss, I don't know if this is normal for your species, but here on Earth that's the type of thing that's generally considered appropriate to bring up on a third date." His voice is gravelly.. "And let me guess, Torch put you up to it? I'll grab Trapster's Glue Gun and maek him into a statue on Fifth Avenue!"

"Who is...oh, the Human Torch. The ring translated some articles and I saw some photos. He looks egotistical. Actually, he reminds me of Guy." She frowns at that. "One may only hope he has the few moments of wisdom that Guy has to off-set his offensive personality." But Natu then shakes her head. "This hopefully will have nothing to do with him." She then steps toward Ben, moving to reach out for his large hands if he permits. "Will you trust me? This is only our second meeting Mr. Grimm, but I sensed you were a good Human. I wish to trust in you as well. I need your help," she says seriously, and sincerely. She could just trick Ben, she is considering it, but something about carrying the Lasso of Truth, makes her feel the need to be as honest as possible - even moreso than usual...which is impressive.

There is just a /glance/ from Grimm, rocky face softening, "Ah, all right Miss. I will." Ben gingerly holds out his hands, and Natu can almost -swear- she can hear him thinking about how if he finds out she's being put up to this he is going to make some matchstick into a street pizza. Or maybe just mutterin -really- badly.

The Lasso of Truth is unwrapped from her waist, and Natu can feel the energy from it. She then carefully ties Ben's wrist, more effective thanks to the power of the rope. Holding the rope, she then looks into Ben's eyes, a tenseness in her body. "Are you a Skrull?" Talk about awkward?! Diana did mention about making it easy. Though Natu will have a second question for confirmation of any potential risks.

Ben Grimm glances over at Natu with his head cocked to the side as she binds his wrists, and he says, quite simply, "No." You remembered to make sure the question minimally!

"Are you the true Benjamin Grimm a.k.a. The Thing?" This is the last question Natu will ask via the Lasso of Truth. The rest, she will go with her gut. She dare not abuse such a frighteningly powerful thing.

Ben just sighs over at her, again nodding, "Yes." Who else would want ot be him, anyways??

Natu then removes the rope and wraps it carefully about her wrist once more. "I apologize for that Mr. Grimm. When I explain the situation, I hope you can understand. In my research, I read an article where Skrull have impersonated the Fantastic Four in the past," and she sighs softly, looking up at you once more when the rope is secured. "May I please have your word that you will not speak of this to anyone, not even your comrades just yet?" Note, she does not make Ben wear the rope for this, she has given him her trust, believing him the good Human she sensed him to be.

Ben Grimm glances over at Natu, "Miss, I can't promise you that." He leans back, "Me 'an the rest of the team were replaced with Skrulls before. Stretch has gotten paranoid since on looking over and making sure the rest of us aren't that. I can check into his equipment, but I can't keep a secret from the rest of them."

"If you have technology that you can be sure has not been tampered with that can detect Skrulls, that is good enough for me. We deseperately need something like that." We? Natu looks directly into your eyes once more. "The Green Lantern Corps has been given a report that has a high probability of truth. The Skrull have deeply infiltrated Earth, and are preparing Earth to crumble beneath an oncoming invasion. Right now, Wonder Woman's rope, is the only way we can tell truth from subterfuge at this point. Thus my interest in the Fantastic Four, and what solutions they may be able to offer in investigating this. I met you before and...even if you spoke very strange English, I sensed you were someone I could trust. I wanted to believe in that." Oh goodie, another secret invasion!

Ben Grimm nods over at Natu, and he lets out a sigh, "What a revoltin' development." He goes on, "I understand." He considers, "Yer gonna want to hit up Cap first. He and the Skrulls go way back. Cap'n can help you figure out who to ask next. I'll work on Stretch and make sure he understands this and that he's him. And god help whomever switched him if they ain't." Ben's eyes burn with fire at the thought of a possible threat to his friends. "Reed should be able to work on something to help detect 'em again. Done it before."

A nod at that, "Green Lantern Kyle is going to work on the Avengers. If I can have my ring study the technology, it may be able to mimic it as well. Then all the Green Lanterns I transfer the knowledge to, will be able to detect them. But as you see, scanning or questioning someone is not easy to do. Especially if they are a comrade. The least intrustive way, the better. We have begun to form an elite team in the Justice League that we know for a fact are not Skrull to spearhead the investigation. We can't do it alone though. I'm sorry to bring some terrible news to Earth. Whenever I visit, it is only when horriable things are happening."

There is a shrug from Ben, "Eh, we seem to get it a great bit. If it ain't extraterrestrial aliens tryin' to sneak in and replace us with stunt doubles, ti's Galactus rummagin' about here like he's some kinda giant raccoon and we're a disposable garbage bin with the lid off."

The ring has to do some translation of that one, but Natu then asks, "Who is Galactus?" Apparently the Corps has not ran across him...yet. They will in time. But more important, "How do you usually contact people? By cell phone, communicator...?" Awww, exchanging numbers!

Ben shrugs, "Lotta ways. Figure the day's slow if Reed's not making some new sorta gizmo that he'll have a new improved version by next week of."

"He sounds amazing, but he is still strange if that is Mr. Stretchy." Natu looks hopeful though. Can she really hope? "I just need a frequency or phone number, something...and we can set up a way to communicate. The Green Lantern ring is very verstile." And she goes to offer her white gloved hand toward you, "I believe some of the Human Green Lanterns would say something like this: Welcome to the Skrull Ass Busting Team."

There's a sigh, "Trust me Miss." Ben elaborates, "They don't have asses. And no, you don';t want to inquire further on that." Ben then hadns her over a small communicator.

The ring quickly scans it, then she hands it back. "If I'm on or close to Earth, I will pick up a call from it." A pause, then, "They appeared much like my race and Humans, but they do not have asses?" This confuses Natu. "I am a doctor, so I am sure any explaination on their biology would not overly shock me." She doesn't get it. Alas, she needs to develop a Human sense of humor. But she really does try for excellent communication.

Ben's gravelly voice is serious, "IF you wanna know the particulars, their primary form actually isn't that fully humanoid, as far as havin' those parts involved in the removal of bodily waste. Trust me, there's only so long you can listen to a man drone on about an alien's excretory systems' before ya give up."

"Actually, I would like to have the documents on their biological details, and if they actually change internally when they shapeshift or if there are defining biological aspects that remain the same." Natu then appears compassionate as she awkwardly reaches out to pat your arm. "No need to repeat it, if I could pick up the information later, that would be great. My ring can translate it." She won't bore or gross Ben out with doctor talk.

Ben Grimm nods over, "Nah, it's okay. Only so many alien' waste processin' facilities you can have to skulk through before ya just learn to not deal with the smell. And hit up Stretch when ya see him."

"Then let me know when you have confirmed his identity, and I shall." Natu then says, "I must return this rope to Wonder Woman." She then says more gently, "I hope to see you soon Mr. Grimm. Perhaps we will have some good news then, and I look forward to speaking to you more about something not involving waste." Or seeing poor Ben covered in it. She really works at not smiling, but Ben can likely tell what she is remembering. Poor Ben. And she isn't human, but she's still being nice, that's good, right?

Ben Grimm just laughs softly, "Reed is as honest and as open as they come, Miss. Sure you'll get along fine. And anything I've had done to me, he's been right there alongside me. Guy's obvlivious, but his brain's in the right place."

"He was not the one I was looking forward to speaking to again Mr. Grimm." But Natu leaves it at that and the energy bubble drops. "Please take care," she says before she moves to take her leave.

Ben Grimm smiles, "No prob. G'luck Miss. And glad ta help." Ben goes to walk out, muttering something under his breath as he slips on one of the discarded banana peels.